Over the past 4 years I have experienced so much. There have been joyful times and times of great despair. In the aftermath of it all I find myself more thankful for the painful seasons of life as a college student, because I have walked through the fire and come out refined. (hopefully not burnt and smelly...) Not for a moment did He forsake me (Meridith Andrews, I kinda stole your song lyrics). There was always a purpose and it was always for my good. Even if it was painful. My 4 years at Northwestern College (soon to be The University of Northwestern - St. Paul) have been beautiful. Beautiful describes the season of life rightly. I went through periods of depression and anxiety. I experienced deep healing of my soul. I was in a wonderful, hard and serious relationship that taught me so much about life and love. I had the opportunity to be an RA my sophomore year. I was able to serve the girls in my hall to the best of my ability as a sophomore juggling a relationship and education classes could. I taught 3rd graders, 5th graders, kindergarteners and most of all my lovely 4th grade students who got 14 weeks with me (lucky them ;)). I lived on my own, paid rent and worked at a restaurant in order to pay the bills. One of my most favorite times during this 4 year experience was being a day camps coordinator at Trout Lake Camps. It was exactly what I needed. Not because all my wants were met. No, because this is when I truly began to learn how to put my desires to the side and love others. I am so grateful to God for blessing me with that experience. The friendships I made that summer were such a blessing. Some of my closests friends in my life as of now are from camp. As I reflect I think about the summer before I came to Northwestern. All my fears, concerns and questions. Now, according to my app (t-zero), I have 4 days and 13 hours until I graduate. I was so afraid, and I had no idea that God had showers of blessings to poor upon me. Now more than ever I see His goodness and grace. I see how these last 4 years have changed who I am positively. I believe I see the Lord differently and the way I view the world has changed. Fear doesn't mark me, but as I walk through each day I fight for love to be the tape that plays in my brain. My passion for teaching has come alive and there is nothing that I'd rather do. Nothing. My heart feels open to loving students and pouring myself out to them. I hope that as I walk that stage and get my diploma, and walk out the doors of Maranatha Hall that I may walk away knowing two things: God is good and He always loves me. Those two lessons are what I carry with me from my 4 years at Northwestern. From that I am more open to saying "thy will be done."
God is good & He loves me.
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