My Hope is Built on Nothing Less

Nothing will change
If all the plans I make are wrong, Your love stays the same
Your light will guide me through it all, I'm hangin' on
I'm leaning in, to You

Nothing can reach,
The end of all Your faithfulness
Your grace is with me,
Through every shadow, every test
I'm hangin' on
I'm leaning in, to You

I don't know where you'll take me
But I know You're always good
My hope is built on nothing else,
Than Your great love, Your righteousness
I will not walk another way
I trust Your heart, I trust Your name
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on, to You

You are my rock
When storms are raging all along,
You shelter me, God
I'm safe with you on solid ground,
I'm hangin' on
I'm leaning in, to You

I don't know where you'll take me
But I know You're always good
My hope is built on nothing else,
Than Your great love, Your righteousness
I will not walk another way
I trust Your heart, I trust Your name
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on, to You

My hope is built on nothing else,
Than Your great love, Your righteousness
I will not walk another way
I trust Your heart, I trust Your name
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on, to You

I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You

I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You
I'm holdin' on
I'm holdin' on to You

I'm holdin' on to You (holdin' on to you)

My hope is built on nothing else,
Than Your great love, Your righteousness
I will not walk another way
I trust Your heart, I trust Your name

-Paul Baloche

I heard this song today, and I think the Lord really wanted me to hear it.  It pretty much sums up my life!  

Let's talk more later, I have too much homework to do now.  I promise I will get around to updating this thing.

- Oh and by the way, I'm graduating in 164 days.

The Pain That Heals

Edmund: So, what was it like... when Aslan changed you back? 

Eustace: No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't do it myself. Then he came towards me. It sort of hurt, but... it was a good pain. You know, like when you pull a thorn from your foot.

The Chronicles of Narnia

I've watched this movie a few times, and it has such an impact on me each time.  Eustace is the cousin of Edmund and Lucy.  He does not believe in their talk of Narnia, but is forced to see that it is a real place when the three of them are brought back to Narnia.  He journeys along with them on their adventures, all the way being skeptic to every supernatural event.  Finally, they reach an island, where they are tempted.  Eustace is tempted as well and gives into this temptation.  It turns him into a dragon.  Later in the movie, Aslan changes him back and this is where the quote is from above.

Every time I have watched this movie, this scene has stood out to me.  The firs time I saw it, it made me think of the healing that God does in our hearts.  I thought of how we can't change our hearts, but God can and will.  It may hurt, but it IS the good kind of pain.  It is the restorative type.  This time as I anticipated this scene in the movie I saw a larger connection in this film.  

We are sinners, and we can't see our own sin.  We are proud, and believe our way is the best way.  Then get ourselves deep in sin.  We get to the point where we cannot change ourselves.  This is where Jesus comes in and heals us.  It may hurt, but it is good.  It is beautiful.  

I think of how gentle Aslan was with Eustace.  He took his claws, and ran them through the sand.  As he did this Eustace was being healed. Then Eustace was picked up from the ground, utterly helpless, and brought to an area where he could help the others defeat fear.

It reminds me that when we were completely sinful, God picked us up, and made us new.  He also makes all things work together for our good.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us

- Romans 5:8

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God

- Ephesians 2:8

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him.

-Romans 8:28

Senior-itis

I am sitting at Caribou Coffee on the last day of my fall break of my senior year, and I have realized it has hit me.  Senior-itis.  What is this you ask?  Or maybe you are familiar with the lack of motivation, late nights because of procrastination, and a longing to do anything, but homework.  I have had this lack of desire to do homework, because let's face it, most of the time homework is not that appealing to the average person.  The benefit of what I would be learning from the homework out stood this lack of desire.  I still see this benefit - in fact it is greater than any other year.  But, the only thing I can think of as i sit on my stool, staring at my computer, is how great it would be to have a book in my hands that has absolutely nothing to do with education standards or a unique scientist from the past.  
Don't misunderstand what I am saying - don't want to waste this year.  This year is paramount for me.  It is as if my footprints in my education are hardly visible compared to the inch deep ones I am making this year.  This year matters in a whole different way.  I am living off campus this year in a pied-à-terre that I have (it's actually just an apartment, but try to guess what movie that is from).  I have a job as a hostess at a Mexican restaurant, and today I started my training to be a server.  I have a car here now.  
All of this change has shaken me up hard.  It's brought me to emotions that scare me.  One very important thing I've learned is that God sees my state of emotions and it isn't too much for Him.  He knows my tendency to think I am responsible for taking care of my own emotions and here I am knee deep in emotions that I can't take care of.  This is where He meets me.  I am learning what the verse really means when it says cast ALL your cares on Him for He cares for you.  There is a beauty and reality about that verse that I didn't understand before.  The Lord is not shaken by my weakness.  He loves me and holds me.  I have been like this child scrunched up in a ball - my fists clenched tightly inward.  And all of this time He has been holding me, waiting for me to take a deep breath out and release my grip so I can feel His embrace.

Senior-itis:

One could think that it is only paired with words like homework, education, and motivation.  For me being a senior is the title of a deep, wonderful, and hard chapter of my life.  

A Very Exciting Summer

This summer was good, hard, challenging, inspiring, life-changing and so much more!  The things that I accomplished are:
-- driving an 11 passenger van with a trailer connected to it to six different locations
-- gave a totally of 19 sermons to children
-- stayed at 5 different family's houses and two camps
-- drove a pontoon
-- hitched a trailer onto a van
-- went a jet ski
-- wake boarded
-- went canooing
-- flipped a canoe on purpose
-- went fishing
-- went star gazing
-- had six minos in my mouth
-- taught soooooo many children how to make parachord bracelets
-- co-counseled with my lovely friend Jamey
-- saw the fireworks on a boat right above my head
-- walked through swampy water to play mission impossible
-- led devotionals for 5th and 6th graders
-- led games for campers
-- was in skits
-- was a part of the worship band at camp
-- washed my hair in the lake with some girl friends
-- got swimmers itch
-- got massive bug bites
-- did not get even ONE tick bite (Praise the Lord!)
-- Killed spiders that were in my shower
-- removed a dead frog from a canoe
-- got pied in the face like 7 times
-- got pushed in the lake twice by campers
-- learned how to properly swim
...Oh the list could go on and on

Trout Lake Camps has become another home for me.  I made so many amazing friendships, I learned so much about what it means to serve others.

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." - Philippians 2:3-4

This verse came alive to me the week I co-counseled with my friend Jamey.  I became a leader and saw that I have a huge capacity to love much more than I ever thought I did.  I know there is so much more for me to discover about what I learned this summer.  I know that this season of summer is done, but I'm not sure about Trout Lake.  I love this camp you guys.  It truly has been a meeting place for me and God.  I found such a level of peace with Him there and was able to express emotions that I needed to share with my father.  I am sure I will share more later.  But for now it is a week at home and then I am moving into my apartment, getting a job, finding a car and starting my SENIOR year of college.  Oh boy - my life is crazy.

Oh Sweet Mother

Sorry...I failed at updating this thing.  I'm back from camp :-(...sad.  I will update...sometime...soon.  yup.  It was such an amazing experience!  I will share later.

Peace and Love people
Peace and Love

Coralville, Iowa - Trip 3

This week all three of us coordinators came together for one trip to Iowa.  It took about 9 hours, but with three drivers it was a smooth trip!  It's so fun to be in another state, and explore what is different and what is the same between minnesota and Iowa, Iowa and Wisconsin.  We are at a Church called Genesis that is in a restored big victorian white house.  Everyone in the community calls it The Big White House.  Usually on the 4th of July they have a community wide barbecue and about 700 people attend the event.  Because it has been so hot this week, and especially today, they decided to call of the event.  As much as it would have been fun to be a part of that, I am glad to have a day off.  And the fact that we are staying with the pastor's family makes it that much more fun, because they have three adorable kids who love to play and snuggle!  Along with the three of us (Abby, Lindsey, and myself) we have two guys on the trip: Josh and Ryan.  They are great and very fun to be around.

The Lord is doing something amazing at Genesis.  There is such a wide demographic of children at day camps even though there are only 17 kids attending.  He is really deepening my heart for children and for them to learn His word and know His love.  When it comes to day camps this week has been my favorite so far, because I feel that there is a new and exciting passion ignited in my heart from God.  It's real and that is why it is so exciting.  I really look forward to where these passions take me.

There isn't a whole lot else to update.  I see God working more than ever, and I am SO glad I chose to work at Trout Lake Camps this summer.  God had promised me that I was going to have an amazing summer and I keep on standing in amazement at how awesome this summer has been.

I would love for continued prayer when it comes to strength and energy to serve the kids and do my job well: for our whole team.  Also all of us on the team are sick in some fashion and so prayer for that would be wonderful.  I think the worst of my sickness is over (cold, fever...etc), but I want it to stay that way!

I think we are going out to eat tonight with our host family, and then seeing the fireworks!  What an adventure :-).

-Jamie

Trip 2 - Montevideo

Another 3.5 hour trip from trout lake and we ended up in Montevideo.  A small town with a walmart, a cute downtown and lots of green grass.  This week I have a team of two girls, Jamey and Ashley :-).  We all look alike, so that is pretty funny and was confusing for the kids at the beginning of the week.  Since there were two Jamie(ey)s this week I decided to go by my middle name not to confuse the kiddos.  I shortened Elizabeth and went with Izzy.  Haha...kind of weird, but it worked.  

This week we got to stay with a couple whose children are all married.  They live in this awesome old victorian house and we each got our own room.  Their bathroom has one of those old time bath tubs...so fun!  The wife works at a mini golfing and go carting business and we got to go mini golfing and go carting as their gift to us!  It was such a blast.  I'm sad I forgot my camera.  For counselor's night out (or girls night out for us this week) we went down town to a consignment shop and then a pizza place.  After that we had some pampering time with nail polish and a foot massage thing.

The kids have been so great.  They are a younger group this week, so gearing our messages to them has been harder, but nonetheless it has been a blessing to spend time with them and love them with Jesus' love.  There are a few kids that I have just fallen in love with!  

Overall it's been a good week - I'm learning the balance between serving and resting.  Boundaries are necessary for me to take care of myself and than serve others!  Please pray for me, that I may be able to have the courage to set those boundaries and live dependent on our Father. I know that is the only way I may serve others the best.  God has been so good and will always be good.  

Thanks for listening,

Jamie